1. NO MAN WILL EVER BE ABLE TO FILL YOUR CUP EVERY DAY. IT’S IMPOSSIBLE AND DRAINING.
Look, little girls want to grow up and live a fairy tale. Doesn’t happen. Be prepared. You husband needs you, just like you need him. You want him to fill your cup? Work on helping fill his. In marriage, kindness is usually reciprocated.
2. MOST MEN WILL FILL THE CUP IN SHORT TERMS TO BE ABLE TO CONQUER.
3. YOU MUST FILL YOUR OWN CUP.
4. YOU MUST LOVE YOURSELF WHEN YOU’RE LOOKING IN THE MIRROR.
Your self worth isn’t determined by how you look, no matter what the world tells you. I’ve seen plenty of skinny people who are assholes. I’ve seen plenty of people who are overweight that are beautiful and I would do anything for them.
5. DON’T EVER ALLOW A MAN TO SHAPE WHO YOU ARE.
You don’t have to lose weight for a man. You don’t have to change for a man. You don’t have to be something you are not for a man. If you think you need to do these things, you are with the wrong man.
6. DON’T EVER LOWER YOUR STANDARDS FOR A MAN. BE PATIENT.
People are going to make demands of you. Here is a piece of advice….
Stay in your lane and do what makes you comfortable. If someone wants to take you out of that comfort zone in a relationship, they really don’t have your best interest at heart.
8. ENVISION THE PERFECT PARTNER. AND IF YOU WANT TO ATTRACT THAT PARTNER INTO YOUR LIFE, BE THAT PERSON YOURSELF.
Don’t be fake. Be who you, look for what you want. But if you are trash, you are going to attract trash. If you are classy, that, too, is what you will find.
9. I HEAR ALL THE TIME AND IN THE MOVIES, “YOU COMPLETE ME.” THROW THAT GARBAGE OUT THE WINDOW.
You don’t need a man to complete you. Have better self-esteem than that. Your mother doesn’t complete me. God completes me. God is who makes me whole. I need you mother, I love your mother, and I value your Mom….but a relationship with God is what you need most.
10. NEVER ALLOW A MAN TO DISRESPECT YOU OR VERBALLY ABUSE YOU, AND, OF COURSE, DON’T EVER ALLOW HIM TO PHYSICALLY ABUSE YOU. THAT’S NOT A MAN.
That’s a coward.
And a marked man…because I’m about to get his ass.
11. FIND A MAN WHO WILL ADORE YOU, WHO WILL TREAT YOU LIKE A QUEEN. A REAL MAN SHOWS BY ACTIONS AND NOT WORDS.
Girls, I’m going to be honest. This is where I need the most work as your mother’s husband. I love your Mom. I just need to do more than tell her. Occasionally, I send flowers or try to buy her gifts…but I need to show it to her in other ways. Helping around the house, trying to do more….
Just remember…that is a two way street. You need to do that same.
12. ALWAYS REMEMBER, WHAT HE SAYS IS WHO HE’S TRYING TO BE. WHAT HE DOES IS WHO HE IS.
The proof is in the pudding.
13. IN ORDER TO HAVE A SUCCESSFUL AND PROSPEROUS RELATIONSHIP, YOU MUST BE ABLE TO SELF-RECOGNIZE.
You are not perfect. Know when you make mistakes and where you aren’t the perfect partner.
14. YOUR PARTNER MUST BE ABLE TO DO THE SAME AS ABOVE.
15. DON’T RUSH INTO A MARRIAGE OR RELATIONSHIP BECAUSE OF LONELINESS OR EMPTINESS. WORK ON YOUR WEAKNESSES AND COMPLETE YOURSELF FIRST.
Be comfortable being alone. Be comfortable with yourself. Work on being the best you can be. That’s all you ever really need to do.
16. A GREAT MAN WILL OVERFLOW YOUR CUP AND NOT JUST FILL YOUR CUP.
17. BE CONFIDENT AND BE HAPPY BEING ALONE. BE CONTENT BEING ALONE. BE CONFIDENT AND BE ABLE TO GO TO DINNER, MOVIES, AND TRAVEL ALONE. TELL THE WORLD MENTALLY AND PHYSICALLY WHEN SITTING AT THE DINNER TABLE ALONE: “MY NAME IS X AND I’M A STRONG, INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO IS CONTENT AND SECURE WITH HERSELF.”
18. YOU’LL NOTICE A JERK COMING YOUR WAY WHEN THEY’RE INTIMIDATED BY YOU. AGAIN, DON’T LOWER YOUR STANDARDS FOR THESE LITTLE BOYS. PLAY WITH THEM IF YOU WISH, BUT DO IT UNDER YOUR TERMS.
19. WAIT UNTIL YOU’RE IN YOUR 30S TO GET MARRIED. THROUGH MY PERSONAL EXPERIENCES, I’VE NOTICED THAT I STARTED TO FEEL COMFORTABLE LOOKING INTO THE MIRROR WHEN I TURNED 30ISH.
Best thing to ever happen to me was to get married at 30 and have y’all when I was in my late 30s. I knew who I was as a person and I was comfortable with it. I didn’t get married because it was what was supposed to be “next” in life. Don’t do that, do it when it is right for you.
20. ALWAYS WORK ON YOUR RELATIONSHIP. DON’T THINK EVERYTHING IS FINE IF YOU’RE NOT FIGHTING OR ARGUING. THERE’S ALWAYS ROOM FOR IMPROVEMENT.
21. FIND A MAN WHO LOVES HIMSELF, ALSO.
22. FIND A PARTNER WHO’S YOUR BEST FRIEND, SOMEONE YOU SIMPLY LIKE HANGING OUT WITH, GO TO THE MARKET WITH, ETC.
23. IT’S A PLUS TO HAVE THE SAME INTERESTS AND HOBBIES.
But not a necessity….your Mom and I have things we like to do alone…and that is helpful.
Dad of Girls 